There are soo many stories, I wanted to paint with you went down in vain,
There are soo many journey, I wanted to live through with you never came,
There are soo many dreams, I wanted to touch the stars which now don't make sense,
There are soo many nightmares, just nightmares turning to reality today,
where is my make believe world where everything was perfect, where there were smiles and joy,
where laughter was the only echo in the valley of my life,
where the skies were always blue and occasionally painted with clouds of your being,
where are the seasons which i felt change even in the coldest winter with just your touch
why is there soo much tragedy when all I wanted was a moment in contained in peace?
why is there a storm which is swaying me away?
why did I lose everything when I was rebuilding life again
what is this dream worth if it is not shared with someone who meant the world to me
what is this fight worth when there is nothing to hold on too
what is this life worth when everything just slowly breaks away,
I thought i would never be here, but I have been to all the places where I thought I never be,
some where nice but those i frequent are my nightmares I live...
Was it worth it letting go and walking away,  may be not today...
what did just I walk away from... I dont know....

note to me

Stories are told to rekindle memories with the spice of imagination,
tunes captures a part of our soul stuck in dimension we are yet to discover,
sometimes movement can tell a lot more that what present or the future can hold,
sometimes i wander in the maze of my existence searching for a why and end up with a why not?
why not just wander, why not just explore, why not just be curious for curiosity sake
knowledge is over rated, miserable pile son conclusions drawn by the mind,
somedays I wish I just could be not be anything
there are too many titles my mind is caught up in, but it forgets somewhere the little explorer
which makes me the person i am today, ending up in a PhD is a biggest adventure I have ever been on...
There was clarity but this is the biggest ride I have been on...
I had a girl friend which didn't work out but imagine all i have seen and experienced i am actually sitting in a whole different continent and actually typing listening to kick ass cool music dude lets make the most of this time dude! stop evaluating yourself there will be millions of test you are yet to succeed or fail but has fun while you are here! this is your adventure come on don't devour yourself from the pleasures of the day!

To me and explorations in the future!

what if?

A lot of "what ifs" goes through my head
makes me wonder and keeps me up
all night in my bed.

A lot of tears run down my memories
thinking about the smiles and the pains.

It just seems like yesterday
pain never seem to fade. I am hurt deeply
somewhere which doesn't seem to heal.

I am on my heels to heal
but always scared to fall right back over my head.

Last time I fell head over heels it was love,
this time it is a bed of nails...